Burns Nicht

Every year, Scotland celebrates it’s most famous poet Rabbie Burns on his birthday, 25th January. For my first Burns night in Edinburgh the Tissue Repair students got together to share the traditional fare of haggis, neeps and tatties. It’s also traditional to have ‘A Toast to the Lassies’ from one of the men and ‘A Reply to the Toast to the Lassies’ where you make fun of each other but ultimately agree everyone’s great and continue to drink. We had a couple of toasts and replies… Here’s mine (a slightly shortened version)…

Thank you for those kindly words
On behalf of all these laddies
These brothers, sons, and boyfriends
(But hopefully not daddies!)

Now I’m sure you’re all considerate
When you are romancin’
But listen up for here’s some tips
On how to please a woman

First of all, get smartened up
A suit, a tie, a hat
Rabbie Burns would be ashamed
To see you dressed like that

He’d woo his girls with crafted lines
So you should do the same
“Hey bbz wat r u up to”
Is pretty shoddy game

Okay, Burns was a player
I don’t endorse his ways
Stay true to just one woman
And see how well that pays

A lady’s best to trust a man
Before she’s swept off her feet
Though feminism’s essential
Don’t think you’re obsolete

We’ll let you carry heavy bags
But not because we can’t
We need both hands to hold our signs
While at the Women’s March.

Laddies entertain us
(Some) laddies listen well
A good friend can be boy or girl
Really who can tell?

So yes, you’ve got your uses
We’re not so different, in the end
So raise a glass to all these here
The laddies, the boys, our friends.

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